By Candice G., eHow Member
Instructions
1. Step 1
Listen, don't talk. You'll be tempted to start pointing out all the reasons why the situation is "not so bad" but children do not function the same way adults do. They are emotional little beings and logic plays very little part in soothing them. Listen intently to what your child tells you about his or her feelings, even if the child is crying too hard to understand. Holding your child and listening to him or her is the most comforting thing you can do.
2. Step 2
Offer personal experiences. Once your child calms down enough to listen, only then should you tell them about a similar personal experience that happened to you. This shows the child that he or she is not alone in their disappointment. You can even point out that, as an adult, you are still disappointed by things that happen to you.
3. Step 3
Offer perspective. Does your child's disappointment stem from a lost competition of some sort? Now might be the time to point out all the things that your child is very good at and that the child who won deserves to be good at some things too. Did the child lose a favorite toy? Help the child donate a small toy to an organization that caters to poorer families in the community, or across the world. Does your child miss a loved one? Write a letter or card. Help your child to decorate the envelope. Whatever the situation may be, you can find a way to help your child put it into the proper perspective without ever using the dreaded phrases "It's not so bad..." or "It could be worse".
4. Step 4
Be understanding. Your child may not get over the disappointment immediately. This doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong, but not all children bounce back at the same rate. Be patient and understanding and soon your child will grow to forget the disappointment itself, but your reaction to it and what he or she learned in the process will say with them.
From ehow